Top Fives
Leyara Rin

Something a drunken Hithual might trip over on their way back to the bar.

These all should be pretty self explanatory, and no, I am not even going to say a thing about the second most popular answer. Ick! I would rather trip over Jurix five times in a row than even see that anywhere near me. I would rather trip over Jurix with the AGC wench with their bar tab and another Hithual five times in a row then trip over #2 once! Very Icky!

Arachnian most likely to get tangled up in their own webbing.

It happens to the best of ..er...ok the worst of them. They practice webbing one of their legs as spiderlings then move on up until they can web themselves successfully, once they have mastered that then and only then are they unleashed upon us all!

Council member most deserving of a long jail term.

My favorite top five subject of them all. If one 'mutt' can change his identity, why not the next 'mutt'? Has his name always been Cynus Dorn? Or did he used to be called Perin? The lying dog who gave Spur to the LoC years ago and who was thought to have been killed, but now many even doubt that and claim he is pretending to be the Seneschel, as if he cares being the traitor that he is. No wonder he aided the mutt in his little plots, and lied for him when he wanted it known he was on Wrathmar when in fact he wasn't on Wrathmar and got no where near the place. A traitor protecting a traitor, how sweet. Dror is next and from what I have seen and heard he needs to be locked up and forgotten about, forever. Kraggon the Hithual Lord who finally is taking matters into his own hands since when he brought up his concerns to this 'Cynus' person he got laughed at, and Rev is also felt to be deserving of some jail time. And of course what would this topic be if the lying, scoundrel, I will lick your boots in private if you only make me a Lord, San elf of Set who is always hiding something. Isn't that right elf? Most feel he should be sent to Wrathmar, one way trip of course.

Psycian most likely to go insane no matter how many drug doses they take.

Talk about an 'A' list..Wow! Sorry Alazam, you just didn't make it this time. I can't say much about the first two but Alyndara and Allandra do have one thing in common, their Frontacian friends of course! What did you think anyway!? That they share clothes? Well, I suppose they could also do that, hrm. Poor Syntrik, it seems you are doomed to go insane one of these days and even if you stop eating and just survive on your cure alone it won't matter! Jealous of you we ain't!

Penthanian most likely to give a damn about something ...... anything.

Well, well, well. Aren't these five just overgrown Secians? I couldn't have picked a cuddlier, more caring lot myself. First on our list is the notorious Setite snuggler, Firanlen, with the emotionally vulnerable Psion Liseli close behind. Nomel has been spotted getting choked up over love poetry at the bardic recitals. Closing out our list are the tenderly sensitive mages Sadat and Winter. Group hug, everyone!

Shandora's Box
Tristene Orlex

Marinda asks Kruses in Secti, "Still busy all da time?"
Kruses says to Marinda in Secti, "Cold."
Kruses says in Secti, "But my tongue is stronger than it's ever been."
- Marinda the Secian, Kruses the Leuian.

Banath says, "Hmm, I think I hear some fine lasses bed calling..."
- Banath the Hithual.

Moondove says to Dror, "I think if you catch a thief breaking the law then you do your job"
- Moondove the Anthian.

Lal yells, "Help!"
Headflinger yells, "No"
-Lal the Human, Headflinger the Hithual.

Weldoian exclaims to Rialla, "I already hurt my hip! I do nae need a matchin' arse!"
- Weldoian and Rialla, Secians.

Headflinger says, "Some fir found a dead child in treehaven and assumed it was me"
Guaire asks Headflinger, "Was it?"
- Headflinger the Hithual, Guaire the Frontacian.

Ragarn says, "I rather like Merlin, can hardly blame him for all this...."
Mimi says to Ragarn, "Muats are evil."
Mimi says, "Muats should become extinct"
Ragarn says to Mimi, "Yes, well...."
- Ragarn the Frontacian, Mimi the Secian.

Voskresenieye says to Saberus, "I AM DRAGON"
- Voskresenieye the Dragon, Saberus the Leuian.

Mimi says, "That's it. I've had it."
Mimi says, "I'm outta this town."
Mimi says, "Let it fall to the cursed undead and Taathians"
Mimi says, "Run by muats, San elves and Flerians."
Ragarn says, "I don't think the Flerians run much."
- Mimi the Secian, Ragarn the Frontacian.

Farenheit says to Dainty, "They could not seek to comprehend that which they could never understand."
- Farenheit the Dragon, Dainty the Secian.

Trittion says in Leuian, "Kill em all"
- Trittion the Leuian.

Baal says, "Zuberi is a moronic excuse for a Human"
- Baal the Dragon.

Callik says, "We got an entire tapestry devoted to the crimes of the Sanene"
- Callik the Fir Elf.

The raven says, "Phannah's gone off the deep end!"
- Someone's frisky pet.

Soyam says to Orin, "Soon you'll know how to wield a quill so well, you can beat Cieran up with one"
- Soyam and Orin, Human.

Claudia says to Rafe, "I danced so much I made Clutter throw up"
- Claudia the Psycian, Rafe the furry green Leuian.

Vortimar asks Rev, "I get arrested for killing a thief and you let an exile run free?"
- Vortimar the Leuian, Rev the Hithual.

Toberas asks Goldie in Leuian, "Even visiting a city led and ruled by Serpent followers is asking for trouble, y'know?"
- Toberas and Goldie, Leuian.

Derkesthai says to Rawcliffe, "I'm just jealous, I'd settle for being a beans and sausage Dragon."
- Derkesthai and Rawcliffe, Dragon.

Mel says in Leuian, "Studding hard"
- Mel the Leuian.

Guaire says to Weldoian, "I could drink up an entire bar and puke out a better run raffle"
- Guaire the Frontacian.

Storz says, "Like a dark, hairless khat, I creep through the night"
- Storz the San Elf.

Arclight says in Secti, "Stop rubbing on me....my fur will stand up on end soon....wait it already does that"
- Arclight the Leuian.

Weldoian says to Lal, "Words to live by, dear...love and be loved. Listen and be heard. Hate and be hated. Ignore and be ignored."
- Weldoian the Secian, Lal the Human.

Cori exclaims to Raangel in Secti, "Taath must be pleased by your devotion to self-inflicted torture!"
- Cori the Usil Elf, Raangel the Arachnian.

Cerberus says to Weldoian, "What kind of breeding is breeding if there are no babies"
- Cerberus the Drag-al, Weldoian the Secian.

Raangel says to Lal in Secti, "BoooWHOOOOO"
- Raangel the Arachnian Matriarch to Spur's webhold, Lal the Human.

Rawcliffe says to Gellidus, "Yes I am the midget drake"
- Rawcliffe and Gellidus, Dragons.

Daemon says, "Oh, I'm the epitomy of humanity in all it's greatness"
- Daemon the Human.

Daemon says, "The Tribune headlines: Citizen clubbed with staff of sage"
Claudia says to Daemon, "Most interesting. Perhaps it might read, Staff of Sage turns on new master and clubs him to death"
- Daemon the Human, Claudia the Psycian.

Cerberus says to Lal, "You're my honey bun, sugar plum, mummy mummy umptious bunny bear"
- Cerberus the Drag-al, Lal the Human.

News
Leyara Rin

** Tchori Darkstar the Leuian ran into TSC the other day and promptly confused the golden drake Voskresenieye Solstice with his psionic abilities. Voskresenieye, too confused to know what color he is, stood there while the Psion Leuian clawed away at him. Tchori was then confused by a fellow Psion standing in the crowd. As Tchori was being fused by the same powers he has used, his confuse on the drake wore off and Vosk started clawing at Tchori, but missed! Kazil the Noble Fir Elf then ran upon the scene and the 2nd stage dragon fled from the mortals.

* Zefish Highwingus aka The Comet has been seeking Loa'Kass! He wants to have tea with him! He also wants us all to know that he has received two marks of his: a frozen purple rose, and a hooded purple cloak.... He also says he has killed Rynock and that he is a Ruler of the Anthians. That's Olds though. Well newer Olds is that, and I guess that's publishable. Speaking Anthian is obesely prohibited. Tell 'em that!

* There have been reports that there is a 500 gold reward payable to the person who knows the mutt's aka Changeman aka Remiron's new name. As to who offered the generous sum, I do not know yet. The wanted list in TS still shows his old name and that surely needs to be updated with his new name.

* Current members of the fanatical Edgewater Pride/Group: Tchori Darkstar, Tavin Darkstar,Morte Darkstar, Goldie Allarek, Khateul Tigerheart, Selabeth Dukhat, Gurrtog Trivvak, Tymas Lordall, Arclight Lastday, Netraa Denad, and a Dragon named Galen who is so loyal to them he lives in Edgewater and even hired the Leuian speaking Oog Gurrtog to teach him to speak the Leuian tongue. Guyver and Mashema have a home there in edgewater and it has been rumored that they privately support all that this new Pride does.. They also seem to be recruiting or trying to recruit members from the Spurian pride to come join them in Edgewater. A few nights back Tymas and Selabeth were speaking with Mala in the Rose about Edgewater. And Selabeth was also seen speaking with Clawntaka, a new Spurian Pride member about moving to Edgewater.

* A few weeks ago Tchori and Dror were heard speaking about the possible sentencing of Denix. It seems Tchori wanted Dror to put him in jail if Denix was also jailed so he could then kill Denix. Several times Tchori called Dror a good friend and Dror shared a lot of jailing info with Tchori. But since Tchori is now Dror's murderer I guess that won't ever happen, or was this just a not so subtle ploy by someone claiming to be honorable?

* A book, a tome of magick no less, was recently allegedly stolen from Treehaven. It seems this book was found at a shrine of Elindale, protected by Undead, and contained within it spells of necromancy." This tidbit of information has not yet been verified to be true as of this publication.

Top

Creative Endeavors

Rev

Rev, Rev, the unsinkable Hith!
Tried to mend Justice in his smith!
He hammered and hammered, perfecting away!
But still couldn't wield Justice
With any Just sway!

Valoria

Valoria is a dancer, or so her name says
She dances 'round Justice in many strange ways
Twirling and whirling and jumping about
Will she ever bring Justice? I seriously doubt.

Gellidus

Gellidus, that humorless Drake
A simple small joke he hardly can take
He claws and scratches, hissing this and that
He'd prob'ly get it if his head weren't so fat!

Saek

Saek, that slimy son of a newt
Has stench and odor extra to boot!
He insulted my darling,
And countered with snarling!
If I'se a fire mage, I'd burn him to soot!

Rich

I offered one silver coin to Rich
(As it was at it was payment for his advice)
He killed me there, without a twitch
And I forever curse him with scale lice!

Rynock

Rynock, that dumb Anthian Lord!
Used to enfore with the point of his sword
He trurned a new leaf
But I still give him grief
It seems I just strike the wrong chord!

Rynock II

Rynock, the Anthian, is really too proud
So on his past successes I'll be quite loud:
He did marry a monk
And had two affairs!
Which got him in a funk-
The likes which nothing compares!
He abused a fowl
Gave up his station
And with a scowl-
Ordered Kerensa's cremation!
It is really quite sad, the dung he's been through-
So I thought I'd dig it up and share it with you.

Berlan

Berlan, the Thug, is a very good Odarian
He's kindly and nice, much like a Flerian!
He's dressed in mail, from head to his boots
He shines of nobilty, right down to his roots!
He's a hero, to which that is sure
He fights back evil, true and pure!

Merlin

Merlin, Merlin, does he really even exist?
If seen, inform him that he's sorely missed.
I hear that he stays at a Tanga resort,
Instead of where he belongs: At Spurian court!
He basks and bathes in the warm Tanganese sun
Who thought being gov'ner could be so much fun?

Bullies

Thugians and Oog's like to push me down
And so do Drakes, and that makes me frown.
Why can't they just leave me alone?
Am I really truly that danger prone?
Why can't they be sent to a place real mean?
Some place like Wrathmar where they'll never be seen.
But bullies will be bullies, I suppose they say.
I just wish they'd be shipped real far away.

Tymas

Tymas, Tymas, that ignorant kitten!
With Odarous is he truly smitten!
He follows him blindly, without heed
Acting in His word, doing His deed
He's ignorant and stupid, a right mean ol Khat!
But thanks to Set, his purse will never be fat!

Kei

Kei Takenshi, that gorgeous Draggle,
She is a catch one would dream to snaggle!
He scales are a scintilating purple and gold
When she walks by, my legs doth fold!
To no others do her looks compare
When she passes by, all I do is just stare...
She swishes her tail and men fall to her feet
A life of such beauty must be quite sweet.

- Zef Highwing

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Zef is up for hire for any of his skills, be it impersonation, jestering, acting, poeming, or companionship. If interested, please look for him around TS or plummeting from the sky.

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The Tribune Staff